The #1 Thing That Makes a Story Memorable (And 4 Ways to Nail It)

Struggling to make your stories stick with readers or audiences?
You're not alone! Many writers get caught up in creating intricate plots and thrilling twists, but the truth is—it’s the relationships between your characters that keep people coming back. If your stories feel flat or forgettable, it could be because you're missing the emotional core that great relationships bring.

In this episode, we dive deep into why relationships are the true heart of every memorable story. You’ll learn how to shift your focus from just plot points to the powerful connections between your characters—because those are the moments that truly captivate and resonate.

Tune in to discover 4 actionable takeaways you can apply today to create more impactful, emotionally charged stories that your audience won’t be able to forget. Whether you're working on a novel, screenplay, or TV show, these tips will transform the way you approach storytelling—and elevate your characters to new heights!

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Transcript

[00:00:00] Zena: What's the difference between a story we watch once and one we'll watch a hundred times? It all comes down to relationships.

[00:00:06] If you think the plot is what makes a story interesting, think again.

[00:00:11] Plot twists come and go, but character relationships leave a lasting impact. Join me today as we explore the why in character relationship dynamics. It's the secret to powerful storytelling. 

[00:00:24] Hello and welcome to the Storytellers Mission with Zena Del Lowe, a podcast for artists and storytellers about changing the world for the better through story.

[00:00:36] Today, we're diving into one of my absolutely favorite topics in storytelling. The power of relationships. Because at the end of the day, story is about people. And more specifically, it's about the relationships between those people. That's what we care about. That's why we come back and read that novel, or watch that TV series, or watch that movie. Now this truth has been impressed upon me even more lately because I have actually stepped out of my comfort zone and I've started taking some improv classes at the Groundlings.

[00:01:11] it's a very interesting process. Because here's what happens. Whenever two people are on stage, the teacher will give us either a location or an activity, which we have to start. So we have to do space work as an activity or we might do space work based on the location that we've been given.

[00:01:31] But the assignment then is for us as the actors to try to get out certain information pretty quickly in the scene. We try to establish the basics. Who we are to each other. Are we brother, sister? Are we roommates? Are we husband, wife? Who are we? What are our names? What are, you know, who are we? And then what are we doing?

[00:01:53] Because the thing is, we might be doing space work, but maybe somebody doesn't know that I'm filling up a coffee mug, and so we have to say that. And then we have to establish where we are. So those are the three things that we're trying to establish, which is pretty consistent when you're writing any kind of story.

[00:02:10] You're trying to give us the same sort of indications, just in a different format. So who are we to each other, what are we doing, and where are we? But that's really just the setup, because the real magic happens when we try, together, to get to the why. Why are we there? Why are we there together in this moment?

[00:02:31] What are the stakes of the scene? Why does this scene even matter? Why are we even talking? The why, the why it matters, is the thing that we're trying to convey. And it always, and I mean always, comes down to Relationship. If you are in a scene, it's so easy for the actors to start focusing on the what. The activities that you're doing in the scene.

[00:03:00] But we don't really care about that. What we care about is why we're even doing that activity and again, it always comes back to relationship. now the same thing happens whenever we're writing a story.Too often, people get bogged down in the what, the specific activity that's going on, whether it's two people cooking in a kitchen or a pair of detectives in an interrogation room. And yes, the what is important, but it's almost never the point. We care because of who the characters are to each other and why this particular moment holds meaning for them.

[00:03:33] At the end of the day, it always comes back to relationships, character dynamics. Thanks. The foundation of every story is connection. That's the truth. That is the thing. The foundation of every story worth telling is human connection. And it's true across the board. Whether it's an improv scene, a television episode, or a novel, or a play.

[00:03:57] It doesn't matter. As human beings, we are wired for community. We are wired for community. for relationships. And the stories that stick with us, the ones that we remember long after they end, are the ones that show us these deep, impactful connections. In fact, think about some of the best television shows out there.

[00:04:19] Maybe it's a procedural drama, like a legal or medical series. Sure, the case matters. The case matters. The court trial or surgery needs to be gripping. But what keeps us tuning in, episode after episode, is the dynamic between the characters and their relationships with each other. We don't have Grey's Anatomy for 20 seasons because we care about the actual medical procedures that are happening from episode to episode.

[00:04:44] We are tuned in because we care about those doctors and their evolution over the course of the series.characters leave and others come on, now we're interested in those dynamics. That's why we tune in. We want to know what's going on with them as they work the case. What's at stake for them personally?

[00:05:04] And most importantly, how is this case affecting their relationship with one another? Sometimes what might happen is that as two people are working on solving something or they're pursuing a goal, right? Because that's what you give your characters whenever you're writing a story. They have a goal to pursue.

[00:05:23] So they have a goal to pursue. They're trying to get something. But, in the pursuit of that, it forces them to confront something in their own relationship. Or maybe it forces them to spend time together when they've wanted to avoid each other. Or maybe it forces them to spend time together and they've wanted to spend time together because they're secretly in love with each other but they're trying to pretend that they're not.

[00:05:46] And now all this time together allows for these intimate moments where you're scared and you don't know what you're gonna do. So, and by you of course I mean your character. So the key is Whenever you're writing stories, even though the mythology, even though the what has to be clear, it's really about the why.

[00:06:09] Who, what, and where aren't complete without the why. So let's go back to improv for a moment. As I mentioned, we start with the who, what, and where. That's the bones of the scene. But if you don't answer the why, you miss the heart. You miss the heart, and then the scene doesn't matter. Now, in my Groundlings class, this why is exactly what fuels the scene.

[00:06:35] Answering the why brings in the stakes and the tension and emotion. And in fact, the emotionality around the Y is what often fuels the scene and allows it to unfold. We don't even really know what we're doing when we're up there, but we're emotional about something and that allows the Y to come out. And guess what?

[00:06:56] that's what makes us want to watch each other. Why are these people together at this particular moment? What's at stake between them? And how does whatever they're doing allow the stakes between them to come out? Again, it's easy to get caught up in the what.

[00:07:14] Focusing on the activity. Maybe it's two characters arguing over how to cook a meal. But if you're missing the reason why this argument even matters to them, it falls flat. If the conflict is simply about the best way to make a casserole, nobody cares! But if the argument is actually about unresolved tension, or disappointment, or a secret that's been festering for years, or how one of them feels disrespected because the other one keeps messing with their casserole recipe, now we have a scene worth watching.

[00:07:46] It's the relationship and the relationship dynamic that brings the scene to life. Which brings me to the next thing. Relationships. are what create the stakes and tension. Now this might sound counterintuitive because obviously if you're writing some sort of procedural you might have the patient's heart give out at a crucial moment.

[00:08:10] And that matters. But you know what even matters more to us than that? Because we're not actually invested in the guest star of the patient. We're invested in how that's impacting the doctor who's the writer on the show. Or whatever the case may be. So this brings us to the heart of it.

[00:08:28] Relationships create stakes. tension and drive the emotional pulse of a story. Let's take a familiar example. Again, imagine a medical drama where the doctors have to save a patient who is in critical condition. Sure. Sure. Sure. We're interested in whether or not they're smart enough to save the patient, clever enough, fast enough, whatever the case may be, but we're riveted if one of the doctors is doubting their skills and their closest colleague is losing faith in them.

[00:09:00] Or maybe there's a past betrayal lingering between them and they have to work together to save this patient when the last thing they want to do is even be in the same room together because they don't trust each other anymore. It's the personal stakes, the way the case impacts them personally and interpersonally that add layers to the story.

[00:09:20] Maybe in this particular storyline you've got a character who has to deal with a mother who is struggling with their child and their child's behavior. And your character is struggling because they never had an opportunity to have kids. And the loss, or maybe they lost a child. And so now having to deal with that mother, and who's maybe impatient with her child, how come they get to still have a kid when my kid was How is that impacting me?

[00:09:53] I'm going to have difficulty now interacting with the other characters. My frustration is going to spill over. Things that I've kept hidden are going to come out. It allows the conflict to deepen. It allows things to get tense and exciting. because the situation is impacting me personally.

[00:10:12] My own personal pain, if you will. And of course, by me. When you introduce a problem in your story, like a medical case or a trial, it's not just about whether or not your character can win the case or save the patient. It's about how it impacts them personally. How it shifts the relationships that they are in.

[00:10:37] How does that hurt them? Or harm their home relationship because they get so obsessed about the case that they're working on. How does it impact their children because they're so obsessed? We talked about this in the series Bosh and how he got a divorce because he was so obsessed with it. Now he has a daughter and it's going to impact their relationship even though she might understand how he has this need, 

[00:11:01] This foundational need to bring justice to crimes that have been unsolved. So then the character relationships between them really matter and that is spawned because of maybe the case that they're working on. 

[00:11:16] maybe your characters are on the verge of trusting each other more. But then something happens in the case that undermines that trust. One of them does something slightly underhanded that makes the other person go, Wait a minute, I thought I could trust you.

[00:11:31] Maybe they were developing a deep relationship and then the other person did something that your character disapproves of. And now that ruins that possibility or it causes them to be suspicious. So, does the case drive them further apart or does it drive them closer together?

[00:11:47] Are they starting to question their roles, their own skills, their relationships with each other? The stakes are always rooted in their personal relationship with each other. That is the dynamic of every story. Relationships and the evolution of relationships. of relationships is the key in long form storytelling.

[00:12:09] This concept is especially critical whenever we're telling stories in a long form. This means in books where there's serials, especially, where there's sequels or multiple sequels, or if you have movies that have franchises, or if you have, of course, TV episodes where you have characters that need to evolve over the course of the story.

[00:12:36] Characters in long form stories cannot stay stagnant if we're going to stay invested in them. They have to change, and their character dynamics have to change. So think about some of the great character duos in storytelling. Even going back in time, like Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson. Or House and Wilson.

[00:12:58] These dynamics work because they aren't static. Now in many ways, House seems like a static character. But as the series unfolded, as it progressed, his relationship with the other two main characters changed. And the best relationships are always changing. Always adapting. And that's what keeps us coming back.

[00:13:20] Even in episodic shows, where the case of the weak formula might make it easy to see. level, the best shows let the characters and their relationships evolve over time.When these characters impact each other, they grow together or sometimes they grow apart.

[00:13:38] But we, the audience are drawn inbecause we see our own lives reflected in theirs. In the second book in the Red Rising series, You've got Daryl who has now been rescued from the jackal and his best friend is Severo. And Severo is now in charge of the movement because Daryl's been gone for a year.

[00:14:02] He's been imprisoned by the jackal for a year. Everybody presumes him dead. so Severo has taken the helm and he's running things. And it causes a rift between he and Daryl, not because Daryl isn't willing to allow Severo to lead, but because he doesn't like the way Severo is leading. He disagrees, because it's causing harm to people.

[00:14:25] Severo wants to be a good leader, but he isn't Daryl. He doesn't actually care about everybody else. He only really cares about his inner circle, but that's what makes Daryl so special. He actually cares about the lowest person on the totem pole, and that's why he is ultimately our hero.

[00:14:46] And Severo is meant to be supporting him, and helping him. But Darrow is in no position to lead because he's been traumatized for a year.While they're best friends, and they love each other dearly, their relationship is hard for a while, and it finally escalates until they come to blows, and they're finally able to resolve things and find a way forward.

[00:15:09] But in another relationship in the story, with Cassius, they weren't able to move forward. their relationship had to separate. And there are other relationships in that where Darrow is constantly trying to figure out how to navigate this journey that he's on as the relationships evolve and grow.

[00:15:29] And sometimes it doesn't resolve and sometimes it does. So, for all the writers out there, this is a core reminder. Ask yourself, how does the case, or the mission, or the quest, or the want in your story actually affect the relationships, the dynamics of the characters themselves? Let the events serve as a crucible, revealing who these characters are to each other in moments of crisis.

[00:16:00] Let them be changed by what happens, even if it's slightly. Over time, these subtle shifts add up to rich, complex characters and character relationships. So here's a few practical takeaways. 

[00:16:15] Zena: However, before we get there, 

[00:16:17] Did you know that there are seven crucial plot points that every story must hit in order to satisfy the audience? And if you miss even one of those crucial plot points you risk losing your audience's attention forever. This is why I've created a free training video for you where I break down exactly What these seven deadly plot points are no matter what genre you're working in These are the essential plot moments that you need to hit in order to deliver a powerful compelling page turning story So be sure to check out my free training video on the seven deadly plot points.

[00:16:56] It's going to transform your writing. Just click on the link provided in the notes or head over to thestorytellersmission. com and you can start watching this free training video right away.

[00:17:06] So here's a few practical takeaways. First of all, don't just define actions, define relationships. Start your story, start each scene by asking, Who are these people to each other?

[00:17:19] Before you jump into whatever it is they are doing, Is there a history between them? How do they feel about one another? We care about that. What do they want from each other? Without this, the what doesn't have an emotional impact on us, the audience. Number two, let the plot complicate the relationships, not the other way around.

[00:17:41] The story itself should act as an obstacle or a catalyst for the character relationships. Instead of forcing characters to serve the plot, Let the plot reveal new dimensions of characters and their relationships. Make the story test them, make it push them, make it bring them closer, or tear them apart.

[00:18:03] Number three. Answer the why in every scene, in every single scene. Make sure you're clear on why these characters are together. Why should we, as the audience, care about those characters? The more meaning you attach to the why, the more engaging the scene will be. Number four.

[00:18:25] Embrace the why. Change and growth. Relationships are fascinating when they're alive and responsive. Even a slight shift, like two characters gaining an ounce of respect for each other, Let each scene impact the character's relationships in a way that builds over time. So to wrap this up, the most memorable stories aren't about events or activities. It's not about the, what the character is pursuing, even though that is the foundation of your story. Rather, it's about people and the connections between them.

[00:19:02] between them. Whether it's two friends navigating a crisis, a team working together under pressure, lovers falling apart, the scenes that move us most are the ones where characters are changed by each other. That's the heartbeat of storytelling. 

[00:19:18] I hope this inspires you to look at your own stories and ask how you're handling your own character relationships.

[00:19:24] And if you want to explore this more deeply, I've got tons of free resources available for you on my website, thestorytellersmission. com. These resources will help you bring your characters and your relationships to life. I look forward to seeing you there. 

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